Thermostat or Thermometer: What kind of parent are you?

Are you an authoritative parent who fears losing control or being embarrassed by you kind? Do you feel that you must control your child’s behaviour because the child cannot control himself or herself?

Or are you a permissive parent who fears hurting or damaging your child and fears not being loved by your child? Do you feel that you must make the child happy at all times because you believe that your child cannot cope with being upset?

Both these parenting styles feel an enormous burden of responsibility and have a hard time having faith in their children’s ability. Your tip for ideal parenting is; Focus on the doughnut, not the hole! What this essentially means is focus on the relationship you have with your child, your strengths and your child’s strength, Not on the problem!

Most people see what is missing yet the important part is the good stuff around it. Children sometimes find it difficult to articulate what they are thinking or feeling. Acting out is an attempt to communicate a message. A therapist uses play to help children express themselves through plat therapy. In play therapy, children express what their lives are like now, what their needs are, or how they wish things to be. When a child feels understood, the need to act out a message ends.

Therefore your ideal parenting style should be to become aware of your child’s need, learn to respond rather than react. In control parents are thermostats, out of control parents are thermometers.

For more information regarding child-parent relationships and therapy contact:
Karolyn Pillay-Moodley
Clinical Psychologist
(PS0110051)
Cell: 083-777-7801
Email: 143rkm@gmail.com